English
If I knew the real you – Confused_Thinker
2019-07-14

If I knew the real you – Confused_Thinker

This is in memory of a friend and this is the first time I am recording something I wrote. Please spare me for the low quality and pronunciation and kindly give me suggestions. Hope you guys will like it – Annu

Books and movies taught me 
No meetings are meaningless
And may be that’s why 
I kept going back to the day we first talked
Thinking back, we never really met, Did we?
You were just that voice on the other side of the phone, I believed to exist
Either way, 
Neither you or me could deny the heart to heart connection we felt
You know..I loved the way we were
I loved ‘us’ from the start till the end
I loved how we were never consistent
How we could switch from frequent calls to no calls, so easily
And then you ring me up on a random day
And talk like it was just yesterday

That’s why, That’s exactly why
I didn’t miss you for many a months
The way you never budged for
 my silly, simple formalities
Never really struck a chord
I was sure, I was so damn sure that
You would still be on the other end of the line, waiting for me
when I needed you, when I looked for you
Until that one day…..
It took me long to realise
That ‘we’ were lost somewhere in between
There was not the faintest clue of ‘you’
Being cold and dead under the sun, I say
And here I was, still waiting for you,
Still hoping for you to turn up one day
And talk like many yesterday’s
But ‘we’ were long lost before I knew

You were never sad, you never cried
You told me how life was not worth wasting
You always had magical solutions to all your problems..
Then why? why of all people..you?

May be, you shouldn’t have been happy all the time
May be you shouldn’t have pretended to be strong all the time
May be you too, at times, wanted to
Lean on somebody and cry.
And me, the one you call yourself your friend never knew
I heard you, but never understood
I loved you, may be I never loved you enough
But don’t the heart that misses you deserve a better explanation, a fair reason..why?

May be this was as far as a friendship with no face could go
Many be this is how a friendship framed on words should end.
Cause words lie while eyes don’t
And those words could make you
Love and hate, heal and kill
All the same
Though it’s a bit too late
I would like you to know
“No matter what, I would have loved you the same, if you just told me who you really were”
And now here I am wondering 
If the ‘You’ I knew were ever really true

Annu George
39

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